This morning I had a rather long involved dream. In this dream, it started out that I was moving in with this girl. Not because I was in love with her or anything. I’m not sure what was happening.

Anyway, in the dream, this girl was supposed to be Hindu. Except she wasn’t even Indian. In fact, she was this girl named Maria, who I haven’t seen since first grade. She had one of those really weird “lazy” faces, that doesn’t seem to move around a lot. The kind of face that could be a flesh mask concealing a lizard beneath. She was super duper weird also. She and I were both in the “smart group” in our class with a handful of other kids. But the thing that I really remember most about this girl Maria (besides her having a really gross smell) is that one time in the middle of class, she peed in her pants and it got all over the floor and seat. Everybody was thoroughly grossed out.

Anyway, so this is the girl I was moving in with. Into an apartment I had never seen (which is something I would NEVER do). Her dad was there. He may actually have been Indian. She had put up a poster of Ganesha or something, and had some books in a box underneath it about Hinduism. Her “dad” was very happy that she was continuing his culture. Very strange.

I also remember being thoroughly pissed off to find out there were no true closed off bedrooms. Just tiny side rooms which opened into this main room. It was not a living situation which I was going to be pleased with.

At some point, the dream shifted somehow. More people came in. And we were suddenly in some kind of recruitment process. We were being chosen and separated into groups, to serve in different branches of a military service. Maria got chosen for some other group. I got left to be grouped with the last set of people, who were basically the grunts. The people chosen to die, to go in first in conflicts, and to see the heaviest casualties. Sort of like in the movie Starship Troopers. That’s what it reminded me of.

Then we went through this indoctrination/training process, where this guy told us how who we were individually was no longer important, and that we were now fighting to uphold a lifestyle, and that we had to do anything, no matter how wrong or awful to uphold that. We ended up crawling through like these tiny spaces and tunnels, with like cobwebs and feces and stuff in them. And all kinds of other shit, all while the guy droned on and on about us protecting freedoms, and while our individual wills quietly ebbed away. I could feel it happening, my brain changing.

But then our first day of training came to an end. We were on some boat out in the water. There was this submarine/spaceship which the boat had dredged up out of the water. Some other group of recruits was dealing with that though.

Also, I remember being in like a mess hall with other recruits, and talking to this one Eastern European girl. She told me her name was “Hania” which is a name I’ve never heard before, but just looked up, and its a Polish pet form of Hannah.

Later, I was also talking to this other girl who I liked named P.J. She came back with me to my apartment to hang out there. But then Maria came home, and this part is weird. P.J. and I knew that Maria had been recruited into some much higher branch, but she didn’t know, and couldn’t know that we had been recruited into the grunt group. Not sure why she couldn’t know that though. The group that Maria had been taken into was weird. She went behind this screen and changed into her costume/uniform. She was supposed to be some sort of weird pirate queen and had a yellow outfit, stilts and a white porcelain mask with a big long nose on it. P.J. and I made up a story about how we’d been taken into some other branch, which I can no longer remember.

Then I woke up.