In my continual quest to read stupid things on MSN, no matter how hard I try not to, I clicked on a link labelled: “When to tell mate about STDs.” It’s just some stupid advice column, and didn’t say anything interesting. Not as interesting as what happened the one time this scenario happened to me. We were just about to “go at it,” and this girl says to me “I owe you a conversation…”

Needless to say, my mind instantly jumped to ALL SORTS of crazy conclusions before she admitted she had an STD. It was actually almost a relief to hear that, over all the wild things I was imagining she was about to tell me after that lead-in line.

Anyway, right before you’re about to have sex is absolutely the single most inappropriate time to tell somebody you have an STD. Actually, no wait, I just thought of two worse times. One is while you’re in the middle of it, and the other is right afterwards. Both of those are much worse. I stand corrected.