Every once in a while, a news story comes along which reaches so deeply into our hearts and souls that it changes the way we think about the world, about each other, and about ourselves.

Today, my friends, I am proud to offer you just such a news story.

BUCHAREST (Reuters) - A elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken’s neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it, the state Rompres news agency said Monday.

It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night.

“I confused it with the chicken’s neck,” Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. “I cut it … and the dog rushed and ate it.”

Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.

This is the kind of thing that needs no witty commentary or interesting observation. It is what it is, and it’s just simply amazing. Mistaking your penis for a “chicken’s neck” is just simply the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

(Special thanks to John for sending me this.)