I had a dream last night where I was back in NYC. I’ve had a few like this lately. In this one I was wandering around and it was starting to rain. I desperately need to “take a shit” so I wandered into this gallery/design studio in order to make this happen. The place in my dream was called ID Design, and it was supposed to be in Soho. Oddly enough, I just looked this up on Google, and there does happen to be a place called ID Design in Manhattan, but it’s way down near Battery Park.

In any event, I wandered around the place, trying to act like everything was cool, like I belonged there, and kept going into all these rooms and stuff. I don’t think I ever found a bathroom, and I probably forgot about it. At one point, this woman stopped me from going into one area, and started asking me what I was doing walking around their building. For whatever reason, I didn’t just admit that I needed to take a shit. Instead, I made it seem like I was doing reconnaissance about possibly getting a job there. I explained that I was a graphic designer, and she took the bait.

But then she made me go through this like weird initiation process, which I was lead to believe everybody who worked there went through. In it, I was made to put on a football helmet, and given this weird plastic ball with holes in it, and all these pieces dangling from it. And I was supposed to put the pieces into the appropriate slots. And then she said, “But you have to do it while breakdancing.”

I, of course, don’t know how to break dance. She then lead me to this main room where all the employees gathered to watch me do perform this feat. I accomplished it successfully, although my breakdancing consisted more of flopping and spinning on the ground. Everybody loved it though, and I was invited back later that night for a party.