Absolutely weird real news item brought to you courtesy of Rigorous Intuition:

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) — A guard who reported a security breach inside the nation’s second-largest chemical weapons depot may have mistaken wildlife for human intruders, authorities said Thursday.

The commander of the Pine Bluff Arsenal said officials combed the area but found no footprints or other evidence of human intruders.

“There’s no doubt in my mind that the officer saw something, but it wasn’t human,” Col. Brian S. Lindamood said. “At this time I have no idea what it could be.”

Lindamood said the officer was patrolling inside a 500-acre secure section of the arsenal where chemical weapons, including nerve agents, are stored.

“He reported that he saw three individuals on foot inside the (secure area) and when he approached in his vehicle they ran into the woods,” he said.

So what the heck did this guy see, and weren’t there cameras all over this base? Was it Big Foot? Aliens? Terrorists? White-tailed deer? This story’s too strange to let go of easily.