I have been visiting this site everyday (when I had the chance) for over a year. Reading stuff here on this site has helped me grow beyond the terrible doubts I have had. And it has helped me intergrate the left and right side of my brain. So I really want to say thanks!

I think it is true- in life there is never a final destination. There is just an ever growing journey– there is always going to be another mountain to climb.
“The old pond,
A frog jumps in:
Plop!”

It’s not like you’re gone. You’re there, your body just has a really FULL feeling. ok. that’s lame. it’s like….you are fully present but you feel this other presence in there with you. you’re in your body but you share it with this other spirit. I keep wanting to say it’s like a full feeling. not tummy full of food feeling but your body feels full. sorry I know that’s inadequate description. it was a powerful experience.

but up until then, I didn’t know that was possible. I always thought those voodoo priestand priestesses that I saw were faking it.

cool stuff. working with spirits never leaves me unchanged.

We always leave him a little toy or some candy.

F.

Through intimate knowledge of Him, they arrive only at the names; because of His transcendence they do not attain to the farthest limit of praise and magnification. Still they contemplate that Being in comparison with which all ele is nothingness, the experience of which is false, the perception of which is illusion, the memory of which is forgetfulness, and whose increase is diminishment. They see thus with the eye of certitude and clear proof the truth of the one who said ‘God existed before all things, and He exists now independent of all that depends on Him.’

Once they arrive at this station, they have come into the grasp of the King, the Knower. He frees them from slavery to sensible knowledge and causes them to die to all other things. Their inmost thoughts are purified and God, may He be praised, is manifest to them through His most excellent Attributes and Names. He gives them a knowledge of what He will so that they assume the posture of servants before their Master. They come to rest in the place where the One who knows their every secret thought watches over them.”
-pg. 62, “Letters on the Sufi Path” by Ibn Abbad of Ronda.

The next throw brought another round of shells smiling up at us.

Your story also reminded me of this quote which I always thought was kinda cool (a writer named Joseph Murphy explaining ashe):

“The sacred world of Santería is motivated by ashe. Ashe is growth, the force toward completeness and divinity. [This is a ] view of the world [as] an ontology of dynamism, that is, a belief that the real world is one of pure movement. In fact, the real world is one not of objects at all but of forces in continual process… Ashe is the absolute ground of reality. But we must remember that it is a ground that moves….”

checking up on your blog every once and a while, your writings specifically on magick were always interesting but it’s much more fufilling to finally get up out of the armchair, isn’t it?